Ghoulies (1984)

This infamous Ghoulies film, release 6 months after the first of the Gremlins franchise, achieved its dubious fame almost entirely thanks to that gloriously ridiculous cover art on the video box. For a juvenile horror fan (and likely the movie’s primary target audience), I was definitely curious, even with my exposure to the source material being limited until recently (one viewing of Ghoulies 2, though I was very familiar with Ghoulies 3).

With the benefit of seeing the original Gremlins, I can confidently say that Ghoulies is pretty a very pale… if not dead… imitator, lacking polish in almost every department, and offering very little in the way of redeeming qualities. Produced by the penny pincing Charles Band and directed by Luca Bercovici, who gave us 1994’s pretty decent Dark Tide, the first Ghoulies is a piece of juvenile entertainment aimed squarely at its demographic, its intentions were clear but its execution was flawed.

The music, surprisingly, is the most notable bright spot. A fun, jaunty little horror score, it’s effective and even a bit catchy. It avoids clichés but also lacks the memorable punch of the original Gremlins theme. Unlike Gremlins or many other successful horror sequels, the Ghoulies franchise avoids a recurring theme, keeping the score distinct for each entry.

One of the main issues is the Ghoulies’ own design. While the concept of goofy, animal-based ghoulies, specifically, a cat, a rat, and a fish (with multiple fish appearing in a fountain scene later) is kitschy fun, especially when covered in goo to make them look appropriately monstrous, this novelty wears thin quickly. The design is inherently clumsy and limited. Their lack of articulation and movement capabilities makes them feel less like slimy creatures and more like poorly constructed, rubbery figures. This significantly undermines their intended menace; after a few scenes, they cease to be genuinely threatening and the human characters often seem bewildered in their struggles against these admittedly limited puppets. It’s interesting, though, that each Ghoulie embodies traits from its animal counterpart, and their distribution changes slightly across sequels.

Unlike upcoming sequels, Ghoulies doesn’t quite lean into pure juvenile silliness as hard as it might expect; there’s a layer of unintentional humour, a knowingness that leans on the audience to enjoy the cheap approach and forgive the film’s various flaws, the poor creature effects, nonsensical plot points, and generally low production values. The acting is similarly limited.

Performances-wise,Ghoulies will win no awards, but the actors try with what they have and take it, somewhat, seriously. There are no particularly well-known faces, outside of Jack Nance, who has a whopping two scenes and serves as the celebrity “get” for the movie (though his character feels tacked on). Ghoulies marks the film debut of Mariska Hargitay, from Lake Placid and Law & Order. A young pre-Police Academy Scott Thomson does get a memorable role as a party-motivated kid with some awful, cringe-worthy dance moves; he really goes for it, anchoring the human element. Victoria Catlin, Bruce Campbell’s wife from Maniac Cop, also creeps in.

The runtime barely struggles to reach 80 minutes but feels significantly longer, giving the film the distinct impression that it ran out of ideas before it reached its conclusion. The plot, concerning a son discovering his father was a crazed warlock and embracing it, only to find there is more at stake, is overshadowed by the infrequent Ghoulie attacks. As the lead character Jonathan (last name is Graves…I think that’s a joke and is as funny as they come) struggles with his relationships and the consequences of murdering his friends, the Ghoulies become a distraction that shows up infrequently and distracts from what might easily become serious.

Then there are the evil dwarves. Who are they? They seem to make up the difference when it comes to the impracticality of the Ghoulies’ puppets. They are the most consistently amusing element of the film, often stealing scenes with their own brand of absurdity.

Visually, the film employs a couple of basic, practical special effects throughout. While perhaps barely industry standard for TV at the time, they are used very sparingly. Their simplicity doesn’t detract as much as the lack of imagination in the design.

Overall, I did not enjoy Ghoulies. It’s an off-putting, stylistically aware but ultimately thin and directionless entry into the franchise. It suffers from a lack of ambition and a failure to fully commit to its premise. The novelty wears thin quickly, and the threat level collapses under its own weight. It would appear this is a series that gets better as it goes on, perhaps leaning into its juvenile roots more successfully later.

I would dare to suggest that the poster is 100% responsible for its success, especially with silly kids like me renting the video because it looks so damn cool … not that I actually rented it. For audiences specifically looking for a fun, low-budget homage, Ghoulies might be worth a chuckle. But for anyone expecting a coherent, genuinely scary, or well-realised entry in the vein of Gremlins, it’s a significant misfire.

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